[{"id":"c7fb415b-d995-4012-b7b1-d80965b55197","text":"That thing in the back of your head you are worried about? It's worse than you think","created_at":"2026-10-07T13:36:00.611507+00:00"},{"id":"a5d8c7e3-6578-4e46-8b38-0b9e623b5784","text":"You have a face for radio, and a voice for print","created_at":"2026-10-04T16:44:26.579969+00:00"},{"id":"da3e4d16-e534-4b25-9ab7-c9216e2a8ee6","text":"Keep smoking - you're gonna die in a car crash","created_at":"2026-10-01T09:42:55.254535+00:00"},{"id":"fcfbed13-681a-420e-889a-5e5986d2717a","text":"Violets are blue, roses are red, never again will you get any head","created_at":"2026-10-01T09:40:26.044065+00:00"},{"id":"1fb8ec52-1feb-4a3c-8b4f-d227519face6","text":"Roses are red, grass is green, you are the ugliest person ever seen","created_at":"2026-10-01T09:39:05.60434+00:00"},{"id":"ef0a42aa-2818-4163-ab48-476e6c48a042","text":"Roses wither, violets decompose, holy shit you've got one ugly nose","created_at":"2026-09-05T08:20:34.456391+00:00"},{"id":"3ad02e2f-bcc3-464c-a990-306aaa4d1806","text":"Roses are red, mushrooms are savory, your parents considered selling you  into slavery","created_at":"2026-08-08T06:05:55.758533+00:00"},{"id":"b47bb451-40aa-44eb-a207-e0ecf4d6155c","text":"damn you","created_at":"2026-06-08T22:25:40.851409+00:00"},{"id":"48b47ea5-f863-47f5-8283-0d658b7adaa8","text":"You smell bad and people are noticing.","created_at":"2026-05-25T14:30:54.270752+00:00"},{"id":"e48a7ffd-5c5b-4692-a034-a253ae128179","text":"Violets are blue, roses are red, even your pets wish you'd be dead","created_at":"2026-05-25T14:29:28.84939+00:00"},{"id":"3a11ea55-f6ea-4207-8f95-da28a76e6a2c","text":"Roses are red, violets are blue, go fuck yourself.","created_at":"2026-05-20T10:59:09.639+00:00"},{"id":"66edff75-0f54-4c40-a656-4d37da4c2fd1","text":"Don't fel so special - you were an only sperm","created_at":"2026-05-13T07:27:28.457788+00:00"},{"id":"6df2fab2-72a2-4dae-8be4-3d754c16993b","text":"You should buy one of those new parachutes that opens at impact","created_at":"2026-05-03T01:05:33.32986+00:00"},{"id":"977d0d06-ca25-46fc-a633-f5d8bd7fca13","text":"Look at you, the little miscarriage that could","created_at":"2026-05-02T07:55:57.260903+00:00"},{"id":"7ffb78b9-cd33-4b5b-a2af-7d9ecf46ef74","text":"You are proof that evolution does not mean progress.","created_at":"2026-04-29T12:18:38.115997+00:00"}]